Sunday, April 27, 2014

Note to self: Just Keep Swimming

I was on swim team for a good 7 years and when Finding Nemo came out and Dory sang her "Just keep swimming" song it always popped inside my head during long swim sets and soon would pop into my head outside of the pool. Now, this song and many other quotes from that movie I find are applicable for many day to day or even life events. We can take Disney quotes, Star Wars, LOTR, Last Airbender quotes or lessons learned from sports, music, art, books, films (most of which are from books), we can find little things like a that song to get us through certain things. What this comes down to is how important it is to just keep swimming, if we stop we'll drown. Life has taught me if I just keep moving no matter how tired or weak I might think I am if I just keep pushing forward, at some points with just a blind trust that it's all pretty much in God's hands at this point and He will get me through whatever I might be going through, but I just cannot stop moving, don't stop doing something. Even if it's just getting outta bed (which some people know that may sound like such a simple thing to do but to others it takes a lot of effort to not just crawl under the covers and pass out again), if we just keep moving at whatever pace we can, soon whatever that speed bump was will be in the rear view mirror. Sure glancing back at how far we've come is good every now and again and important to remind ourselves of the strides we've made but, I've found it's hard to get places and keep moving forward if you're looking backwards. Life needs a balance. I'm no philosophical genius obviously, just writing whats been on my mind. Translating thoughts to words is hard, written is easier than spoken I think but seriously, words are hard.
But recently the only thing I've been able to tell myself is just keep moving, don't look back, things in the past are in the past for a reason, these are only bumps, life seems crazy right now, you always say it'll slow down but it just picks up pace. You don't know how a plethora of things are going to work out, most of which you have little to no control over and the things you do have control over... you still don't know exactly what's going on there either. And that's alright. You are bombarded by a million questions and judgmental eyes but why should that bother you? People would still judge even if you did have every single detail of you life planned out. What they think doesn't matter it how you think and how you feel. It's your life not theirs. If' you're thinkin about living out of a camper traveling the national parks, do your research first like you always do. And money...sigh... money...there's no words for that one. Just keep working your ass off like you always do and don't be stupid about spending. pay shit on time... just like you already are. You might not know what's gunna happen after August but, you'll figure it out. You always do. You follow your heart and your dreams and have a good mind for council to reason things out when you're heart is a dumbshit (she's been good at that lately). You've got a pretty good idea of what you want and when you don't know what you want you know what you don't want (which is more helpful sometimes). Yes you can be indecisive... you already knew you had to work on that along with many other things which you've already improved leaps and bounds. You're not who you were and you know who you can become while having a pretty good idea about who you are and who you want to be. Stay true and Just keep moving. Just keep swimming.

So... Note to self:

Monday, February 17, 2014

Note to self: Luck might just be an illusion.

"Luck of the Irish" , "Lucky Streak" , "Lucky Duck" , "Lucky Stars" , and my favorite "Lucky Son of a Gun" I've never really quite considered myself "lucky"...per say. Blessed most definitely. I've been blessed with a lot but lucky I've always thought of a little differently. I'm sure if I really sat down and thought about it I'd have a few stories people might say were "Lucky" but, those stories like the near death sorta stuff, I'd say it was God's hand in on it, in one way or another. My best friend has this thing against the word "Lucky", which I never understood her despise of the word although, I think I am starting to realized I really truly do not have any luck. what so ever. I've never had luck because I've always had.. and have.. God... or maybe it's all one in the'm not sure... just kinda wingin it like I am learning to do with other parts of life but, either way, there's no such thing as luck I guess... there's only reason... a reason for everything... a lesson or a blessin... from The Big Guy.
I'll still use the word outta habit I'm sure but, I think I'm starting to get it... this whole "being lucky thing"...people also say make your own luck which is not only slightly annoying to hear but has always translated in my head as "work your ass off" which I do and will continue to do..that's probably why it's slightly annoying to hear people suggesting you to do something you're already
I need to sleep.

Note to self: I have something better than luck. I have God.
                    Keep on keepin on and keep praying and talkin to Him and trying your best to live for Him.
...Done n out.

Friday, February 14, 2014

Note to self: Throw it into 4WD

Life's a bumpy road... So throw it into 4WD and floor it through the mud an muck and do a few doughnuts along the way... Or eat a few doughnuts but either way try to just make the best of it all. Life's messy and you're gunna get a little dirt on your tires anyways might as well try and make it the best drive you can.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Note to self: Hopelessly Hopeful

I can't fix every thing that's broken or hurt.
I can't take home every stray pet I find.
I can't be everyone's friend (I go nuts just trying to be the best friend I can be to the ones already in my life).
I can't change a lot of things if the time aint right.
I sure as hell already know I can't change people, but that never stops me from trying to help them and be there for them...which I've come to realize only hurts me in the end. (it's always good to remind myself of this more often than not, people DO NOT change and if they do it has to be on their own time because they want to and because of the right reasons).
I can't solve every single problem.
I can't turn back time.
I can't be perfect.
I can't always keep the peace.
I can't live up to peoples standards of who they think I should be. I'm gunna be who I am.
I can't take back the stupid shit that likes to come from my mouth.
I can't stop's tiring but I'm hopelessly hopeful.
I can't stop caring about everyone in my life and everyone I meet.
I can't hide my love of art and nature.
I can't stop loving and hating life. (Peaks and Valleys...chock full of peaks and valleys)
I can't stop looking for good in people and this world.
I can't stop learning. (I don't change... I just learn new things)
I can't stop moving, not that I'm fidgety, but always move forward, turning the next page until I hit the next chapter. I put my metaphorical life car in drive, rip off the rear view mirror, and never look back but never forget where I've been. Keep it in drive. Never reverse. I wont get anywhere near my future potential if I go backwards.
I can't focus right now... and write my 10page paper but I can write a blog post...
There's a lot I can't do, but I can't stop being me.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Note to self:

To be honest...I'm not really sure how a blog works... actually I'm not really sure about a lot of this tech stuff...I suppose it's fairly simple and straight forward. Half the people that read this just fell out of their seats I'm sure lol. But for a girl who dreams about getting out of suburbs and city I'm surprised I spend as much time on the interwebs like I do haha. (yes I just said interwebs)
 I guess this is just another place to post work, thoughts, or whatever your heart desires in hopes that maybe you'll connect with people on similar grounds, inspire people, or someone will see it, spread the word, and build another social network of "followers"....maybe commission who knows. With so many things to be "following" out there I should stop following and start leading my own... well whatever this is. Not that I follow much to begin with, for being a 24 year old and just figuring this stuff out while all my Illustration friends are over here on Cintiqs or making awesome paintings on Photoshop and I'm like, "Look at my traditional art...oh look I scanned it and turned it into vector work. Look... my version of Illustrator wont save anything with text unless I save "for web"... Oh.. it decided to shut down in the middle of my project that's due in 3 hours. Technology may or may not have a vendetta against me. yeah... Hi guys, I'm new here.. in the digital age. I've been living under a rock apparently." Even my fellow glassblowers noticed my lack of tech savvy and said it was cute... I don't know if cute is the right word for it but I'll take that word over the other options. haha Everyone is speaking some foreign language that is all about these "hashtags", "vine videos", "snap chats", and a plethora of many other terms I hear in passing but don't use. Thanks to the teasing of my brothers I learned what a "casual" is. haha In gamer terms I suppose I'm a networking casual.
                  1. casual gamer
casual gamers make up the silent majority of computer and console game players that:
1. use pc and console games as a means of socializing or to connect with friends rather than as an achievement or to further their reputation as a skillful game player.
Fill in the blanks change a few words and that's me haha Casually using networking to connect with friends rather than achieve to further my reputation as a skillful artist. hahaha
Anyways...I'm not completely ignorant to these things... but I have been stuck in my hobbit hole for far to long reading, drawing, day dreaming, pinning (I think I get points for using Pinterest... but I think I quickly loose those points for not using it to it's full networking capabilities). Lets just say the Networking Gandalf just came knocking on my door and I am reluctantly going on this adventure. LOL
This should be good.
SO... Note to self:
        Post more stuff on blog and facebook art page.
        Update website more.
        Keep it classy and a little sassy. haha as long as I'm having fun with it others might too (I'd like to think that's true, but this whole blog thing might just end up being me talking to myself too).
People will love it, people will hate it, people will talk about it or people wont know what they're talking about, people will glance over it but people will never see your work if you don't get it out there.
        Get Photoshop... and a version of Illustrator that doesn't want to sabotage you.
        Sell right arm and get a Cintiq haha

Monday, October 1, 2012